ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I dont want to tell you. Lets just say that a lot of things are reminding me of your dick right now
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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