drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I took a hang over nap infront of the door to my 9am class
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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