its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
Last week in my political science paper I quoted the Mighty Ducks. This week, I compared the Constitution to a weird pickle law in Connecticut (by law, it's not a pickle unless it bounces). So, yeah, clearly I'm ready to be back to being a college student.
i would compare it to sliding down a velcro-covered fireman's pole naked. no more bearded men for me.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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