Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Double high-fived his wife and her sister on the way out. If I'm not the best mistress ever tell me how.
Randomize
