the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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