Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
Just remember, it's never too late to make a porno
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
