i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
You did what with his pubic hair?
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
