would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize
