so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
We got cut off at the bar, but it's okay because I tactically rolled behind the bar and grabbed a bottle of whiskey. Meet me in the back booth when you're done puking in the bathroom. This is about to get real slutty.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
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