I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I bought emergency contraception until I / we decide how to handle that. And target gave me a gift receipt for it. Awkward.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Does it look too obvious if I buy wine and candles!?! In my defense there is a gigantic snow storm coming.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
