so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
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