Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
Just found a copy of intimate toy times in my mom's trash can...
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
my taxi driver is listening to 50 shades of grey audiobook. this is uncomfortable.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
