Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
