I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
Randomize
