I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
at the time fanning him with a dish tray seemed like a good idea but when we found it buried in the dirt the next morning i questioned our judgement. needless to say he still threw up even with the extra breeze.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
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