Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Is there any way to un-invite somebody to a wedding? I just checked out the other family, and I can't have a cockblock there.
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
She made a roadhead CD. Can I marry her?
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
