just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
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