Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Randomize
