That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
Watched him slip somethin into her drink. Dragged him of his bar stool, punched him out, and told her what i saw. Bartender used some chemical to confirm presence of rophynol. Just woke up at her place
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
