Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
Your the only person I know that needed stiches after a Monday morning conference call. How are you in your 20s? How
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
Randomize
