U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
