Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
A 40 year old man just put his hands on my thighs and said in these exact words "you're so beautiful and gorgeous and innocent. But life sucks and you'll probably turn into a whore."
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize
