I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I HAVE A FLAME THROWER. COME SEE IT. IT’S SAFE AND WORKS.
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