If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
He danced with some other girls and you started yelling "I can't believe I wasted half my Chili's gift card on you" at him
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
as a side note pls kill me
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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