I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
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