meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Should i put up a tasteful banner for your party that says last chance to sleep with maya?
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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