sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
That should be a holiday. like easter. but bulges instead of baskets
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
What I thought it would be sexy pouring melted chocolate down here chest, ended up in second degree burns. Hot food and sex do not mix.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
He got about halfway through singing "Drift Away" before he passed out and broke my coffee table.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
