Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
So I love how we keep introducing our friends to sex toys. It's like pay it forward vibrator edition.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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