id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
Randomize
