chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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