Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
