well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
My right boob is officially about a handful while my left is 1 and 3/4 handfuls. I'm staring at the mirror falling into a deep depression.
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
