Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
I'm paying a homeless guy $20 to follow me around bars tonight with a boombox playing the theme to Rocky.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
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