I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
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