He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
Randomize
