a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Booyah. Found 8000 pesos in my closet and that's apparently 608 US dollars
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
The air was thick with penises
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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