I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
I’m going to bedazzle that dick
What does that even mean
No idea, but I guarantee he’ll get hard every time he remembers it
Randomize
