just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
