we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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