Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
Randomize
