You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
Randomize
