haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
Randomize
