Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Oh my god my purse is too heavy for me to dance with boys cause it has too many stolen sink faucets in it
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
