Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
She was really sick last night--but i was too drunk to bring her chicken noodle soup after the bar, so went by taco bell and got her a chicken burrito instead
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Randomize
