How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
