Sponge bath it is.
What are these yellow papers in the kitchen?
These are the tickets we got last night.
Did i sign this one as Grizzly Bear?
Yes...yes you did.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
He offered me handsanitizer after a hand job, you can't tell me he's not perfect!
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
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