So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Are we in a gay sports bar?
So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
So glad I can hide money in my wallet and drunk me is too stupid to find it. Hangover sushi ftw.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Randomize
