so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
