But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
