i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
Randomize
